Radiohead lead singer Tom York.
Radiohead have announced that fans who purchase tickets for their gig at the MEN Arena on 6th October 2012 can choose the price they pay from the various options available to them through the Ticketmaster website.
“We have a great partnership with Ticketmaster”, said one of the ones in the band who isn’t Thom Yorke.
“Our fans will literally be able to choose any price that they are willing to pay for their ticket. As long as that price is either £47.50 or £65.00 of course. Oh, and you’ll obviously have to pay a £3.75 booking fee, £2.50 handling fee, £1.95 Greenpeace donation, £4.00 electricty surcharge and 5% stamp duty.”
“But the gig will undoubtably be a sell out, so we suggest fans buy a few more tickets than they need and flog the rest on eBay.”
“This will give some fans the choice of paying hundreds for a ticket, which is good”, added Not Yorke.
The band have confirmed that they won’t be playing any proper songs from their first three albums at the gig and will instead perform random beeps and noises from the 19 albums they have released since 2000 which no one can remember the names of.
Lead singer and dictaphonist Yorke is known to have become highly sceptical of choruses and tunes since catching himself enjoying a Weezer gig in 1999.
The innovative dial-up modem tribute act are known for finding alternative methods to touring and releasing albums.
Their 2006 album Bleep Test was not given an online or store release with the band instead opting to attach copies in vinyl format to the back of endangered ospreys before releasing them in to the wild from a lighthouse on the isle of Guernsey.
The stunt was a PR disaster after most of the birds flopped in to the sea. Thom Yorke subsequently recorded solo album Splashdown in tribute to the dead birds using nothing but a fax machine.
Support for the three-date UK tour has been confirmed as a sad child holding a solitary Homebase energy-saving R63 8 watt edison screw lightbulb.
March 7, 2012 at 15:43
It was all uphill from Tilda Swinton.
March 8, 2012 at 12:30
What a dreadful article! Cliché overload leaves vomit in my mouth
March 8, 2012 at 14:37
Jesus.
March 8, 2012 at 16:42
Did you spit or swallow?
April 20, 2012 at 13:52
You Sir a a pompous arsewipe
March 8, 2012 at 17:45
Never knew the words Fax machine could cause me to awaken so much shit in my pants. :’)
March 9, 2012 at 10:04
This site isn’t funny.
March 9, 2012 at 12:58
This site is definitely funny.
March 9, 2012 at 15:37
I concur.
March 10, 2012 at 08:53
The TOM Yorke comment under the pic gave it away!
March 22, 2012 at 01:12
it really is that good journalism that would make christopher morris or peter o’haranannrenarne proud.
March 21, 2012 at 20:37
Aah, I get it. The writer of this article was definitely one of those obnoxious, clueless, beer-guzzling twats who totally ruined the Old Trafford cricket ground gig in 2008. Just another simpleton who can’t get his head round anything they made after ‘OK Computer’.
Stick to listening to Oasis and the Happy Mondays in football singalong-style, with your arm around your equally twatty Henley’s-wearing mates. And stay the fuck away from our Radiohead gigs.
The outprice the ‘casual’ fans thing worked thank god.
March 21, 2012 at 22:48
Now now….theres a place for Radiohead fans. Its just that it is somewhere very far away from me.
March 21, 2012 at 22:52
You elitist knobhead,fuck off and grow a sense of humour for fuck sake!! Your the exact type of person that this is aimed at!! This site is ace too!!
March 22, 2012 at 01:10
thats a common reaction to a bands change in direction. this is a spoof news site, so theres a chance that the writer could be joking. i loved the 19 albums of beeps since 2000. even radiohead have been known to joke about it. as you’re obviously a fellow radiohead fan, asking you to lighten up would be pointless.
March 21, 2012 at 22:56
Tom York is a cunt.
March 29, 2012 at 21:36
Your mom goes to college
March 21, 2012 at 23:08
I love how some of these spazheads are offended ! Radiohead would chuckle if they had the capacity to show positive emotion. I think these people who are upset have made this more funny for me and completes a thorough smashing of the overly serious society.
Good article !
March 22, 2012 at 08:55
God, the only thing more dull than Radiohead’s music is their fans…
March 22, 2012 at 11:19
I love Radiohead & this site. Top work!
March 22, 2012 at 11:20
I love Radiohead & this site! Top work! People need to lighten up
March 22, 2012 at 12:51
thom yorke is a cock-eyed snaggle-toothed wank-sock.
March 29, 2012 at 21:38
Does wank sock require a hyphen?
March 29, 2012 at 21:35
I’ll never get the time back from reading this tripe. The irony is that I sent a message to tell you this. Can you do a report on homs please? Some cracking snipers out there
July 11, 2012 at 14:20
Dont agree with the dissing of their music, but the ticket price theme dissing is spot on.. Good satire all round!
July 15, 2012 at 22:21
some truly good info , Sword lily I observed this.
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