NEWS | Radiohead fans can ‘pay what they want’ for Manchester concert

March 7, 2012

HOME, NEWS

Radiohead lead singer Tom York.

Radiohead have announced that fans who purchase tickets for their gig at the MEN Arena on 6th October 2012 can choose the price they pay from the various options available to them through the Ticketmaster website.

“We have a great partnership with Ticketmaster”, said one of the ones in the band who isn’t Thom Yorke.

“Our fans will literally be able to choose any price that they are willing to pay for their ticket. As long as that price is either £47.50 or £65.00 of course. Oh, and you’ll obviously have to pay a £3.75 booking fee, £2.50 handling fee, £1.95 Greenpeace donation, £4.00 electricty surcharge and 5% stamp duty.”

“But the gig will undoubtably be a sell out, so we suggest fans buy a few more tickets than they need and flog the rest on eBay.”

“This will give some fans the choice of paying hundreds for a ticket, which is good”, added Not Yorke.

The band have confirmed that they won’t be playing any proper songs from their first three albums at the gig and will instead perform random beeps and noises from the 19 albums they have released since 2000 which no one can remember the names of.

Lead singer and dictaphonist Yorke is known to have become highly sceptical of choruses and tunes since catching himself enjoying a Weezer gig in 1999.

The innovative dial-up modem tribute act are known for finding alternative methods to touring and releasing albums.

Their 2006 album Bleep Test was not given an online or store release with the band instead opting to attach copies in vinyl format to the back of endangered ospreys before releasing them in to the wild from a lighthouse on the isle of Guernsey.

The stunt was a PR disaster after most of the birds flopped in to the sea. Thom Yorke subsequently recorded solo album Splashdown in tribute to the dead birds using nothing but a fax machine.

Support for the three-date UK tour has been confirmed as a sad child holding a solitary Homebase energy-saving R63 8 watt edison screw lightbulb.

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28 Comments on “NEWS | Radiohead fans can ‘pay what they want’ for Manchester concert”

  1. Jonathan Hopkins Says:

    It was all uphill from Tilda Swinton.

    Reply

  2. Anonymous Says:

    What a dreadful article! Cliché overload leaves vomit in my mouth

    Reply

  3. NotYorke Says:

    Never knew the words Fax machine could cause me to awaken so much shit in my pants. :’)

    Reply

  4. Anonymous Says:

    This site isn’t funny.

    Reply

  5. anon Says:

    This site is definitely funny.

    Reply

  6. Anonymous Says:

    Aah, I get it. The writer of this article was definitely one of those obnoxious, clueless, beer-guzzling twats who totally ruined the Old Trafford cricket ground gig in 2008. Just another simpleton who can’t get his head round anything they made after ‘OK Computer’.

    Stick to listening to Oasis and the Happy Mondays in football singalong-style, with your arm around your equally twatty Henley’s-wearing mates. And stay the fuck away from our Radiohead gigs.

    The outprice the ‘casual’ fans thing worked thank god.

    Reply

    • Anonymous Says:

      Now now….theres a place for Radiohead fans. Its just that it is somewhere very far away from me.

      Reply

    • lint Says:

      You elitist knobhead,fuck off and grow a sense of humour for fuck sake!! Your the exact type of person that this is aimed at!! This site is ace too!!

      Reply

    • chris lowercase Says:

      thats a common reaction to a bands change in direction. this is a spoof news site, so theres a chance that the writer could be joking. i loved the 19 albums of beeps since 2000. even radiohead have been known to joke about it. as you’re obviously a fellow radiohead fan, asking you to lighten up would be pointless.

      Reply

  7. Anonymous Says:

    Tom York is a cunt.

    Reply

  8. Lippy Says:

    I love how some of these spazheads are offended ! Radiohead would chuckle if they had the capacity to show positive emotion. I think these people who are upset have made this more funny for me and completes a thorough smashing of the overly serious society.

    Good article !

    Reply

  9. Anonymous Says:

    God, the only thing more dull than Radiohead’s music is their fans…

    Reply

  10. Anonymous Says:

    I love Radiohead & this site. Top work! ;)

    Reply

  11. Mandy Says:

    I love Radiohead & this site! Top work! People need to lighten up :)

    Reply

  12. Anonymous Says:

    thom yorke is a cock-eyed snaggle-toothed wank-sock.

    Reply

  13. geoff chips Says:

    I’ll never get the time back from reading this tripe. The irony is that I sent a message to tell you this. Can you do a report on homs please? Some cracking snipers out there

    Reply

  14. adameus Says:

    Dont agree with the dissing of their music, but the ticket price theme dissing is spot on.. Good satire all round!

    Reply

  15. Stanton Henricks Says:

    some truly good info , Sword lily I observed this.

    Reply

  16. Read the Full Piece of writing Says:

    I am curious to find out what blog system you happen to be using?
    I’m having some small security issues with my latest website and I’d like to find something more safeguarded.

    Do you have any suggestions?

    Reply

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. Niklas' blog » Blog Archive » Thom Yorke vs Tilda Swinton - March 8, 2012

    [...] that in the picture if not Tilda? They still haven’t changed the article. This stuff makes the music geek in me [...]

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